What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Make Nazis afraid again!

What is your most erotic sex story?

TEXT:

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Is it okay for me to wear girls’ underwear?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

What sexual experience did you have at a highway rest area?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Do intellectuals who peddle pseudoscientific tripe like simulation theory ever stop and think they are just dumb NPCs for Illuminati bot wars?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Were knights’ lances practical weapons, or were they just for sports?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

What story do you have involving a public restroom?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why did my ex move on so quickly?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Hundreds of Mysterious Giant Viruses Discovered Lurking in The Ocean - ScienceAlert

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why was Cars 2 so bad?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

What should you answer when someone says to you in French, "au plaisir de vous revoir"?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.